Your Blog Will Always Be There For You
As some of you may have already noticed, I took a bit of a break from my blog since June and am only now getting back into it. I left for a few reasons. First, I got a full time job and simply didn’t have enough time or interesting things to talk about to keep it going. Second, my anxiety improved significantly, and I didn’t feel like I needed my blog the way I did when I first started writing. I’ve always used my blog as a way to say all the things I don’t know how to say. It provides me with kind thoughts and support when I feel lost and alone. And for that, I’m very grateful to my readers.
The third and probably most important reason I left blogging was that too many people in my life knew about it, and I felt like I had lost control of it. I started censoring what I could talk about because I knew that my boyfriend, my good friend who now lives in my city, and my sister were all reading it. Maybe only occasionally, but I had no way of knowing what they’ve seen, what they knew, and what they thought about it. And I don’t want to have conversations with them about the things I post on my blog. Writing is very personal for me, and things I share on here are often things I would never share in real life. It’s like my last post where I admitted that I look at other men and have thought about cheating. As you can probably understand, I couldn’t write that if I thought my boyfriend was going to read it. He may be in the same position as I am, or he may not, but either way it’s not a conversation I want to have.
The few months away from blogging were my way of hoping all the people in my life forgot about my blog, or thought that I forgot about it. From here, I’m hoping to get back into blogging because I really miss it. And I like spilling my deepest, darkest secrets with strangers who will never meet me. This blog is a source of freedom for me, and it’s going to continue to be that way.
It’s good to be home.