Confession: Older Men are Sexy.

I’ve been watching a lot of House and Sherlock lately, and I’ll admit I find both lead characters rather sexy. Which is odd, since the lead actor in House is 54 and the lead of Sherlock is 37. As a female in my early 20’s, I found this intriguing. And beyond that, my boyfriend, James, is 5 years older than me. I didn’t think that was much of a difference, but I can assure you my parents did. Still, I’ve been contemplating what makes older men appealing to us 20-somethings and I’ve come up with 5 main reasons:

1. There’s something outrageously sexy about a man who knows who he is, what he wants, and what he wants from you. A guy who knows how to please you, and genuinely cares about your satisfaction. A man with a career and financial stability who will never have to awkwardly ask if you can cover his rent this month because he actually couldn’t afford his new TV. A man with a life that is right for him, and who sees you as a great addition to his life but doesn’t need you to feel fulfilled. He’s happy and knows himself and where his strengths and weaknesses lie. He’s comfortable being himself and doesn’t feel the need to try to impress you or put on a show. He just is himself, and that makes him very appealing.

2. With younger guys you eventually hit the “this is fun and all but where is this going?” moment. I’m not down for a fling, and I don’t sleep around just for shits and giggles. If this isn’t going to be a relationship, I’m not interested. And unfortunately there’s a lot of “I’m just not looking for a relationship right now” kinds of people in my age group. Which is fine, but I have no interest in getting involved with them.

3. Twenty-something guys are immature. Which is fine if you’re at a party trying to see who can shotgun a beer faster, but not so great when you need help with your taxes and his response is “I dunno just don’t bother with that shit hashtag YOLO”. I’m not sure at exactly what age the maturity finally kicks in, but if anyone finds out please let me know so I can avoid all men younger than that.

4. I’m lazy. Any guy who gets bored spending a Friday evening at home watching movies and cooking dinner ourselves is not worth my time. I can’t deal with always having to be doing something. I like rest, I like couch time, I like video games. I mean partying and drinking and socializing are fun but they’re so much effort. And then there’s the whole process of getting ready and finding something to wear and figuring out who will be there and wait if Jill is there and Ben is there it will get weird cause Jill slept with Steve and… Long story short, drama is stupid. Know where there’s no drama? On my couch watching Netflix. Except for the dramas I choose to subject myself to. And at least those I can turn off.

5. Men age differently from women. I blame society for teaching us that men with graying hair are desirable but women with gray hair are defective. If a man will only get hotter as he ages but I’ve already passed my prime and am on a decline now for the rest of my life, then mathematically we can maximize our respective sexinesses by me dating someone several years older than me. And what guy doesn’t want a beautiful young woman? Win win.

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About janinerussell

The transition to adulthood; reflecting on the past to create a better future.

4 responses to “Confession: Older Men are Sexy.”

  1. TheBitchWhoKnits says :

    Yes! Agreed! 🙂

  2. Letters to Sherlock says :

    I agree but on the flip side, statistically men die before women, so it’s sort of in our interest to be with someone younger? (But hey, being a 30 something it’s age appropriate for me to love Sherlock and House!)

  3. Gerri says :

    I agree that older men are sexy, even at 48, older men are still sexy. The trouble with older men, not all but a lot, they are still immature, which is why they are not still married or with someone, may not be financially stable, and may only want a younger woman to make them feel younger, which doesn’t work. I would stick with 5 years either side to be safe. Aging together, is a wonderful thing. At about age 30, I think intelligence, likes and dislikes, kind of even themselves out, and when he turns 70, you at age 40-45 will be wondering how the hell he got so old.

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