As September Rolls Around Again
I read an anxiety book that said something along the lines of “anxiety is almost always a physical manifestation of how you really feel inside”. Maybe that’s why my anxiety struggle really started last September. I had just moved to a new city and felt like I didn’t fit in. To be honest, I was worried that I had made some sort of horrible life mistake by simply doing what I felt was best for me. And not knowing if my family was behind me on this decision was tough to take. Maybe part of me honestly didn’t know if I’d be able to take care of myself. What would I do if I ran out of money? When you’re far away, you don’t have the option to just go home.
Moving out was a significant event in my life, and although it was marked with anxiety issues and a lot of fear, I’m still glad I did it. Well, September is about to come around again, and part of me is worried that I’ll have the same issues as I did at this time last year. Last September I had my first day of work at my new location, and it resulted in a panic attack. Part of me is worried that that will happen again this year when I go back, even though I know that it wasn’t the day or the actions that made me panic, it was my reaction to it. I’m in a better place this year, and I’m optimistic that this year will be better.
I’m going to make it a great year, and this time I won’t let my anxiety hold me back.