A Long Uphill
To tell you the truth, my anxiety’s been a lot worse recently. It got a lot better in January. I had some time at home to relax. I started yoga. I went to church for the first time in a long time, and have kept it up until now. I even went to group therapy for 5 weeks, which was great for helping me calm down and understand why I get anxious.
Now, though, it has started creeping back up on me. That week in the middle of February that I had off of school, but was working every day was really rough. Well, rough enough that it led to a total breakdown. And now it’s been with me for the past couple weeks, just reminding me that I’m still suffering from anxiety that doesn’t go away just because I want it to.
The worst part about the anxiety coming back is the nausea I get. It’s a constant state, and it affects every single thing I do. Sometimes I can take my mind off of it, or eat a handful of almonds which seems to help. But still, I go to work, and my stomach is churning. I look ahead to the future, worry about upcoming exams. I worry about the summer, employment, and just wanting to go home for another break. My brain needs rest.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that anxiety is a struggle. It goes in phases, sometimes lasting for long periods at a time. Don’t get discouraged. If anything, those periods of less anxiety need to be enough to make you believe that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe one day it won’t be an issue for us at all. But for now, all we can do is try our best to stay in the present moment, and not worry about what’s coming.
Anxiety is a marathon, and there aren’t any ways to cheat or take a shortcut. Some parts will be easy, and some will take all your strength to not give up. Keep going, and don’t let the pain stop you from moving forward. There’s thousands of others running alongside you, and know exactly what you’re going through. We can get through it, all of us, it’ll just take a bit of teamwork.
So who’s willing to jog it with me?