Socks Creep Me Out

Source: Google images

Everyone is weird about certain things. Some more than others, I’ll admit, since I have a few of them. And this is a prime example. So here goes…

Socks creep me out. I understand that they have a purpose, which is to keep feet warm. And that’s great, most of the time. I really hate the feeling of them. My mom used to buy me the ones that came all the way up past your ankles. Those just fueled my hatred for socks. I used to roll them down and overlap them. Anything to hide them or pretend they weren’t there. And now I only wear the absolute tiniest, least useful socks ever which don’t even come up to my ankles. If I didn’t need to keep my feet warm and prevent rubbing in my shoes, I wouldn’t wear them ever.

Here are five of the strange rules I live by, in approximately increasing weirdness levels.

1) Socks in sandals is never okay. Especially with flip flops. That is just confusing. If it is too cold for just sandals, put shoes on.

2) Toe socks are a terrible, disgusting invention and should all be burned. There is no reason to wrap fabric around each toe. Just the thought of it unnerves me.

3) Socks are always okay while in shoes, but without shoes, socks should never be worn alone, unless with long pants. (Which means if you are wearing shorts and shoes, and you take the shoes off, the socks must come off as well. There is no room for shorts and socks together.) I have recently overcome an OCD thing that when I am changing the pair of pants I am wearing, I must remove socks until the new pair of pants are on. It is a struggle, but I’m making headway.

4) When you are getting dressed, the socks should be the last thing to go on. Or at the very least, they must come after the pants. One time my boyfriend put on his underwear, then socks, and I literally cringed. It just irks me for some reason.

5) Socks should never be worn in bed. Ever. I don’t care how cold my feet are, putting on socks is not the answer. And if you are in bed with me, either sleeping or otherwise, there are no socks allowed. In fact as soon as you enter my room you should probably just take your socks off.

And as a side note, layering socks is just weird. I only do it in my military boots because they don’t fit otherwise. Or in my combat boots for hiking purposes. But that is only to prevent blistering, and you can bet that they are rolled down as much as possible to prevent the awkward halfway-up-calf look. that look never works. And it applies to men’s dress socks as well: if your socks are pulled up normally, I sure don’t want to see it.

The strange thing is that feet don’t bother me at all. Nice feet are fine as long as they aren’t gross. And I looooove shoes. Especially nice shoes. It’s just the socks that creep me out.

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About janinerussell

The transition to adulthood; reflecting on the past to create a better future.

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