3.4 He Took My Virginity… Then What?

After losing my virginity to Mark, we were together for a week before I flew home. Now that my spring break was over, it was time to get back to my life in Winnipeg. I had a few months left of school, then planned on working all summer long. I was hopeful that when I was back in Ontario, Mark would come and see me again. But it was a long few months, and being long distance again was even tougher. I now knew what it was like to be physically with him. He was the guy who took my virginity. I was in love with him, and was hopeful that we would be together for a long time in the future.

At the end of April I was sent back to Ontario for more military training, which meant I was about 3 hours away from where Mark lives. On the second day of my course, he surprised me by showing up on base. I was very excited to see him, though something was weird about our meeting. His face looked different to me for some reason, like my brain didn’t connect his face with all of the things I had been feeling over these past months.

Mark was only able to stay for an hour or so before he had to leave, because it a was a long drive back and he was concerned about the rain and fog that was coming making driving difficult. I said goodbye once again.

The next weekend, Mark invited me out to the lake where his family has a small cottage. I had Friday off, and we planned on spending those three days together. He picked me up, and we drove for about 5 hours (we got slightly lost), and got there after dark. We spent a lovely night cuddled together, enjoying having the place to ourselves. The next morning his mom, sister, and sister’s boyfriend arrived. I knew his family members, and they were always very nice to me. Still, we wanted some alone time so we decided to go for a bit of a hike.

I’ve said before that Mark is in the military just like I am. Well, Mark warned me that there was some pretty bad flooding in the next province, and they had several people on call in case the military was called in to help. Mark had volunteered for it, not expecting to be called. And even if he did, he was told he would be given 48 hours notice if they had to go. So I figured, even if they called first thing on Friday morning, he wouldn’t have to go anywhere until Sunday morning. So all was well.

Mark and I began our hike. We wound our way up a hill, and found a remote location with a hidden lake among lots of trees. We sat next to the lake, held each other, and were very happy with how things were. We were now more comfortable with each other, and would talk and laugh and enjoy the beauty of nature.

And then Mark got a call.

The flooding has been worse than expected, and the military was being brought in. Could he get to the city and be ready to go in three hours?

I was absolutely crushed. We ran back to the cottage, and he started throwing things into a bag and getting ready to go. I remember his mom looking at me standing in the doorway, and asking what was happening.

“Mark has been called in,” I told her. She nodded, understanding the implications.

Mark left hurriedly, kissing me goodbye. He said he was sorry, and would see me soon.

We ended up driving back to the city for the night. I spent the night alone in Mark’s bed, wearing a t-shirt of his. And in the morning his mom was kind enough to drive me back to the base. So I spent about three or four hours in a car with her and her friend. She was so nice to me the whole time. I felt bad for making her do that for me.

And I spent the rest of the weekend depressed and alone, back on base, thinking about the weekend I thought we would have together, feeling how hard it is to be away from him once more.


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About janinerussell

The transition to adulthood; reflecting on the past to create a better future.

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