Anxiety Problems: A Call Out For Help
This is a little bit different from my usual posts, but there is something I need to admit to anyone who is willing to listen.
I’ve been having anxiety problems lately. They started in early September when I first moved to this city on my own, and have been pretty bad. That was my first time moving out, I’m at a new university halfway through my degree, and I’m now completely responsible for my own well-being. I also transferred to a new military unit, and I think that’s where the root of my problem lies.
On the first day at this new unit, they formed us up on parade (standing out in the gymnasium), and that’s when I first started freaking out. I was standing there rigidly, and my heart just started racing, my mouth got dry, I got nauseous and started to black out. I went down on one knee, and someone came and helped me to a chair. I was still very nauseous, so I ran to the washroom and dry heaved for a while. Nothing came out, but I still felt very ill. Also, I was really embarrassed. Not the greatest start at a new unit.
After that incident I was fine for a while. I did a few parades and stayed calm, and had no problems. But then one day I took a pill for my menstrual cramps, and it made my stomach bleed. I felt really sick, but started to feel better a few hours before work so I decided to go in to work anyway. And just like last time, we formed up on the parade square, and my mouth got dry and I passed out. And it was quick! I went from being perfectly fine to faint and sweating in about 3 minutes. When we were formed up, I felt trapped. The problem is I was thinking about how I’m not allowed to move, and it made the anxiety worse.
Now every time I go back out onto that parade square, even if we aren’t parading, I start to feel anxious and sick. Often just thinking about going in to work makes my stomach churn, and walking in those front doors I feel a sense of dread. And I don’t know what I can do to change it.
So this is kind of a call out for help… Has anyone gone through this? Does anyone have any tricks that keep their mind busy or get rid of anxiety, keeping in mind I have to stand still on parade and can’t put my head between my knees or anything? Right now I need any help I can get, because I’m scared it will happen again.
Thanks for listening. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.